Bedtime is one of my favorite times of the day. Almost every night Colver and I snuggle up for some one on one time and talk. Topics range from thinking up silly names to call Daddy (I know, that's how bullies are made. Don't judge.) to what toys he should take on vacation...sometimes though things can get real...
"Mom, when is Ms. Ashley going to have her baby?" Colver asked.
Our very close and long time friends were pregnant with their first child. Colver was SO excited about Mr. Mark and Ms. Ashley having a baby. He couldn't wait for Ms. Ashley to have her baby.
"Well, it is still growing inside her, but soon it will be time for him to come out."
"Mom, how is the baby going to get out?"EEEHH! Baby questions. Luckily, I had just had a baby the year prior and David and I had prepared ourselves for this.
"Well, remember how when Mommy had your sister we watched the video and the baby had to go through the mommy's bones?"
It was a video with a skeletal representation of childbirth, completely appropriate for his age. It had addressed the issue and fielded his questions...until now.
"Yes, but Mom!" (Colver pinches his belly) "but how is it [the baby] going to get out of Ms. Ashley's skin?"
OH, Wowzers! I think I may have even said "OH Wowzers!" out loud! Guess the video wasn't going to suffice anymore.
The vagina talk was fresh at this point, only about a week earlier. Guess this was the time. *Deep Breaths*
"Well, honey, you remember when we talked about how and Daddy are boys and you guys have a penis? and that is where your pee comes out? And remember how Mommy and Caisley are girls and we have a vagina? Well, we have a place where pee comes out and we have a another place where babies come out, and that is called the vagina."
Colver looked puzzled. My heart skipped a beat...OH NO! TOO MUCH!...*Deep Breathes*Colver held up his thumb and his pointer finger in the shape of a tiny "o" and held it up to his eye. He peered through it..."Is it a tiny baby sized hole?"
"Well, actually Colver, you are right. It is a tiny place."
"Ummm...Mom! Then how does the baby get out?"
Did he just call my bluff?! Did he just call bullshit on me?!
"That's a good question Colver. See, when it's time for the baby to come out the little hole stretches and gets bigger and let's the baby out."
Colver thought over it for a second. I could tell he was determining the plausibility of my explanation. The silence stretched on. This really couldn't get more awkward. This could so turn out to be a disaster.
"OH I see! It gets bigger so my baby's head can come out! And the baby's shoulders! And his body! And IF his foot gets stuck they just pull it right out!"
*SIGHHHHH* "Yep honey. If the foot gets stuck they just pull it right out."
I mean, he wasn't wrong.
He wasn't wrong.
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